I hope you will excuse my lack of posts after I explain my week. I know Ddonn is getting closer to the end (she made her goal of Valentine's day - without being put on bedrest, YAY!), and I am supposed to be entertaining her with trivia questions. (I fail.)
The week started out normal enough, with BooBear sick, again. This time he was well for about a week, the longest duration since last December. Werty has had this crud for at least two weeks, so I guess it was inevitable. BooBear came down with it last weekend. I am finally succumbing to it now. It's nasty because it settles right into your chest first. People at work kept asking Werty if he was okay today and if he had seen a doctor yet. Nasty, nasty cough. Poor BooBear has been so tired, and you can see bags under his eyes!
Monday, the department head comes to talk to me to see if I was serious about not coming back next year. I told him my plan to talk to the principal about turning over the ESL program to my ESL Aide, who is finishing his Math endorsement, with the intention of him teaching ESL and Math, splitting his time like I have been doing the last 3 years. Then I could work part time, just teaching Social Studies. He was relieved to hear that I would be willing to come and teach the IB class.
So,
Tuesday I spoke to my boss about possibilities for next year. Was there any chance for part time work? Would they be willing to let me teach the IB class for one more year while they got someone else trained? I also gave my recommendation that about my Aide becoming the new ESL Coordinator. But, the assistant principal simply said, "Part time is nice for you, but a nightmare for us." He's helping my boss with the master schedule, and he's the kind of person more likely to care about athletics than the health of the IB program." I know there are a number of teachers expecting their first child at work right now who all want part time, but dang it, this is my second, and childcare for two outweighs how much they pay me. They have refused everyone, except one, and that was because there are less student requests, so her enrollment numbers were down, and they were hoping she would go part-time. Also, they have another position they want my ESL Aide to apply for, a full time Math position. So, they want to find someone else who will take over the same classes I teach. Someone who will teach both ESL and Social Studies. (Which parents and staff members have all called a crazy decision because I teach such specialized classes - but I remember Mrs. Snell saying, "No teacher is irreplaceable" when she retired mid-year. I think I know now why she did it mid-year, it's a tax advantage that lets you get more of your retirement money.) If they can't find anyone, then I can re-apply for my job and be put in the hiring pool for the IB class/part-time. So, the answer is really no. I wasn't expecting an answer right away. I was hoping my boss would consider the options I was suggesting for a few days, and then get back to me. So it was a little shocking.
Wednesday, my ESL Aide comes to me and tells me that he has been approached about taking over for a Math teacher who is having difficulties and can't finish out the school year. He would be a long-term sub this year, and be one of those interviewed for the permanent position next year. That means, I lost my only full time ESL Aide this week. He starts teaching Math in his own classroom next week. He showed the other ESL Aide the piles of filing he hasn't touched yet, and the red folder check is in two weeks. Not to mention that she has to do all the state ESL testing that she was already involved in. But, I am excited for him. This is his opportunity to finally start his career.
The assistant principal over ESL already chose someone to put in my department to take his place, without me having a say in it. She is a friend of another teacher, and substitutes at the school a lot. I have been told that she is very smart and speaks Spanish. Not that she has any experience or training with ESL kids or ESL testing or paperwork. Which means, with my other Aide gone, I have to oversee her training. Oh, and she can't help with the ESL state testing, because the certification and ethics training occurred in January.
And it's crazy time for me with my IB kids. I am advisor for three extended essays, and they are due at the end of the month. And let's just say this years kids procrastinated more than the kid I was advisor for last year. There's still one students I haven't seen anything from yet. I have to not only conference with them, but grade these papers before I send them off for a second opinion. As soon as those are done, I have to receive and grade the IA Historical Investigation papers before those get sent off at the end of March. Meanwhile, we are in the middle of our paper one topic, so there is a lot to cover before I go on maternity leave.
Wednesday night was parent-teacher conferences, which meant a 12+ hour day. I had one family show up after it was over, while I was still there trying to get a little planning done before going home, so I was there until 7:30, without getting any planning done for the next day. I had a constant stream of parents lined up, without a chance to eat anything. They brought around snacks, but it took three families for me to eat one cookie, which was all I ended up eating. The good news is, I talked to a number of 8th grader parents about the IB program. Two of them are reconsidering it. A few others just wanted reassurance that it wasn't going to burn their kids out because their kids want to do it.
That brings us to
Thursday, exhausted and rushing to get to my Dr. appointment. The principal wanted my resignation form that day, even though it wasn't due until Friday. So, I had to go down to the office and straighten that out after school before I could leave, which delayed me drinking the orange stuff until 2:45. But that's fine, the appointment was 3:30, so I can take the test after seeing the doctor. Nope. After making BooBear and I wait in the waiting room for 45 minutes (when he is supposed to be taking a nap, so he was bouncing off the walls), I finally took and failed my glucose tolerance test. Thankfully, they are open on Monday so I can take the fasting test on President's Day. Werty will have to drive me home by the third hour, in case I faint. I haven't actually fainted before, but my blood sugar has been low enough that the nurses thought I should have. Definitely shouldn't be driving.
The best part of Thursday was when I picked up BooBear and said, "Remember we have to go to the doctor today?" And he responded, "Oh, listen, baby, heart." "Are you excited to listen to the baby?" "Yeah." So cute! He's starting to get excited about the baby.
Today, I had to turn in the form giving my notice not to return next year. Since I was already explaining to the students why today would be my ESL Aide's last day in our class, I also told them I wouldn't be back next year. AND I started crying. AND I decided not to tell my other classes, because I will just bawl. I will let the word trickle out through the grapevine. I seem to be okay talking about it in short bursts with a few students, but I lose it in front of the class. Even as I write this, it makes me cry.
I think it is a
great blessing that I will be staying home with my children for the next few years. It will also be an adjustment. But I will also miss working with my students, seeing them grow, and trying to make a difference in their lives. I will miss all of my colleagues, who, let's face it, make up my social circle of friends. As I was crying in front of my ESL class today, my feelings reminded me of how I felt when I came home from my mission. My goal when I left on my mission, scared and uncertain, was to enjoy my mission so much that I would cry when the stake president told me it was time to remove my name tag. And I did cry, sincerely. And that was the feeling I had today when I thought about not being back next year and I looked out at my students.
